First Lines is a series of blog articles inspired by a friend’s suggestion that I write a post on how to write the first line of your story, I hoped to inspire other writers and point readers to books they might enjoy. Plus, it would hopefully help me craft better first lines for my own books.
As writers, we’re often told that the first line of a story must hook the reader (particularly if that reader is an editor.) Implied is that the editor will not buy the book if the first line isn’t great. But the hooky-ness of a first line is in the eyes of the beholder.
Today’s first lines are from science fiction and fantasy books classified as humorous. I hope you enjoy these.
Harry Watt’s office was at the intersection of Dumaine and Bourbon Street, on the first floor above the casino, and across from the strip club in the heart of the French Quarter in New New Orleans. Any faded private eye pulp novel from the last two hundred years would have contained an office like Harry’s. It was small and dark, and would occasionally creak and vibrate as the hover-trains flew through, or when events got a little heated down below. He had made repeated requests to his landlord to undergo repairs, but such matters tended to get lost in translation. Mandarin was not Harry’s chosen language, neither, one could argue, was English.
Harry Watt Bounty Hunter, Harry Watt Book 1, Rob Guy
Gideon Quinn considered the cards in his right hand. Since said cards were so faded he could barely see the original suits, and since what was visible tended to waver in the glare of the setting suns, they required some serious considering.
While he considered, his opponent—a Nikon the outside world had known as Dr. Ephraim Rudd, but in Morton answered to “Doc,” “Prisoner 64326,” or, “Hey, you!”—shot one finger out to catch the drop of perspiration sliding from his nose, and brought it to his tongue.
Gordon, long since sweated dry by the day’s labor, tried not to envy Doc the pittance of moisture.
Soldier of Fortune: Fortune Chronicles 1, Kathleen McClure
This is the story of Harold the Ass, who would one day be known across the far-flung reaches of the galaxy as Dread Pirate Harry. But today was not that day. Today was just another morning on an idyllic grassy plain not unlike one you’d find on planet Earth.
Upon this grassy plain grazed a herd of donkeys, Well, most of them were grazing.
To all outward appearances, Harry was a typical young standard jack with a shaggy gray coat, offset by solid patches of white around the nose and eyes. Unlike his companions, however, Harry could talk.
Of Donkeys, Gods, and Space Pirates, Starship Ass Book 1, Ethan Freckleton and J.R. Frontera
Dry Jasper had no idea that in six days the world was prophesied to come to a fiery end. She was preoccupied with her growing stack of past-due bills, and the cold realization she had less than a week to ring up enough sales to pay the rent on her cramped storefront. Otherwise her crystal shop risked getting evicted from its embarrassingly skeezy location between a pawn shop and a 24-hour liquor store.
Ah, the glories of owning your own business. Trying to ignore the feeling of creeping dread, Dru shoved the unpaid bills into a drawer.
It Happened One Doomsday, The Crystal Sorceress Series Book 1, L. MacNaughton
Forty sure was turning out to be fabulous, alright.
Aching joints no meds could solve ✅
Graying temples that appeared overnight ✅
Chin hairs that popped up like what-a-moles ✅
Mediocre job with no chance of advancement ✅
Just think about eating a cookie and gain ten pounds ✅
Oh, and I was currently being yelled at by an eighty-year-old man who wore a sweater vest despite the fact that it was ninety degrees outside.
The restaurant had emptied long ago, staff clearing the tables, stacking chairs, sweeping the floors, and instead of doing inventory like I needed to, I had been dealing with Burt for an hour.
Be Careful What You Witch For, Wishing for a Magical Midlife Book 1, Tee Harlowe
Clarification
There are no affiliate links in this post. I don’t make a cent off of the books listed on this page. Usually I pull these titles at random. They are from Amazon, my personal library, my area public library, or other online booksellers.
Are You Hooked?
Do you want to read any of these books? They are here for your enjoyment. Whether you purchase these books or borrow books from a library, consider leaving a review of books you’ve read. Reviews don’t have to be complicated. Just say what you liked or didn’t like.
Your review helps other readers decide if the book is for them. It also helps the book get more views by the people who will want to read it.
Check out previous First Lines posts.
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