Through the Haze is a poem I wrote a very long time ago. I wrote it during a time when my life had been turned upside down and nothing was comfortable or clear or certain. It is an uncomfortable poem from a troubled time. I am full grown, an adult.I had a childhood once.It is lost and I cannot find it.I search for a memory to cherish and findCurtains of fear and painAnd I don’t know why.The fear rises upThe curtains become walls of iron,But I must know.Fearful, hopeful, I tear a curtain down,And only get a glimpse, a fragment,More curtains, fear, and pain.The fear rises up.Do I really want to knowWhat is on the other side?I must.Terrified, I yank a curtain down.Too much, too soon.The curtains harden.Black walls with sharp edges.Do they hold me outOr hold me in?I cry with frustration, fear, and pain.My tears soften the wallsAnd I face the curtains again.Because I must. I am very fortunate. Caring therapists and friends and family helped me through that dark time. It took some time and a lot of soul searching. But I came out of that dark place. I can visit the things I wrote then without becoming […]