The Insanity of Inequality

In 1851, the state of Illinois opened its first hospital for the mentally ill. The state legislature passed a law to protect people from being committed against his or her will. The law required a public hearing before that person was committed. With one exception, a husband could have his wife committed without either a public hearing or her consent. All the law required was “the permission of the asylum superintendent” and one doctor who agreed with the diagnosis. In the summer of 1860, Elizabeth Parsons Ware Packard (1816-1897) was a victim of that law. Such was the insanity of inequality. 

black and white photograph or linotype of Elizabeth Packard a woman who faced the inanity of inequality and fought it.

Early Life

Betsy Parsons Ware was born in Ware, Massachusetts on December 28, 1816, to Lucy Parsons Ware and Reverend Samuel Ware. The oldest of three children, she was the only daughter. She changed her name to Elizabeth as a teenager.

Her father, a Calvinist minister, made sure all his children were well-educated. Elizabeth studied French, algebra, and the new classics at the Amherst Female Seminary. She became a teacher.

Elizabeth fell ill during the 1835 winter holidays. Doctors treated her with emetics, purges, and bleeding for “brain fever.” But her symptoms (headaches and feeling delirious) continued. Her father believed her condition was from stress and checked her into Worcester State Asylum for several weeks. Some speculate that her symptoms resulted from tight lacing her corset, which caused restricted breathing, fainting, and “poor digestion.”

Marriage

In 1839, twenty-two-year-old Elizabeth married the man her parents insisted she marry. Theophilus Packard, a conservative Calvinist minister was fourteen years her senior. They had six children and lived in Western Massachusetts until September 1954. 

They moved to Kankakee County, Illinois. She worked as a teacher in Jacksonville, Illinois.

A New Life and New Ideas

Spiritualism and other modern religious movements intrigued Elizabeth, a religious woman. She questioned her husband’s beliefs and started talking openly about her ideas to his parishioners.

Alarmed by her refusal to follow his wishes, Packard questioned Elizabeth’s sanity. 

His suggestion worried Elizabeth enough she consulted an attorney. The attorney assured her he could not commit her without a jury trial.

In the middle of her husband’s church service, Elizabeth states she was going across the street to worship with the Methodists.

Packard arranged for Dr. J. W. Brown, masquerading as a sewing machine salesman, to speak with his wife.

She complained to the “salesman” about her husband’s domination and his accusations that she was insane.

The doctor told Packard what she’d said. Packard decided to commit her to an asylum.

Committed

Elizabeth came face-to-face with the insanity of inequality on June 18, 1860, when the county sheriff forcibly removed her from her home. 

They committed her to the Jacksonville Asylum. At first, she had a private room and could keep clean and healthy.

black and white photograph of an 5 storied white insane asylum with multiple connected buildings.

The superintendent of the state hospital, Dr. Andrew McFarland, saw her several times. When she refused to agree she was insane or to change her religious views, he had her moved to the 8th Ward for the violent and hopelessly insane.

Over the next three years, Elizabeth steadfastly refused to agree she was insane or to change her beliefs. Attacked and harassed daily, she also witnessed abuse other patients suffered. She wrote her thoughts and experiences on scraps of paper she found. And she collected written testimony from other patients.

She maintained good hygiene, routine physical exercise, and cleaned the filthy rooms of Ward 8.

Discharged to Home

Depending upon which source you read, either the hospital decided it could no longer keep Elizabeth or her oldest son turned twenty-one and had the legal authority to remove her from the asylum. 

She fought the release. She wanted to finish writing her book, and she was afraid her husband would lock her up somewhere else. 

In the fall of 1863, the hospital discharged her with a letter stating she was “incurably insane” and returned to her husband.

Packard had placed locks on everything. Elizabeth could not get food or clean linens without his permission. Before long, he nailed the windows of their former nursery shut and locked her in. She had no fire or warm clothing. Meanwhile, her husband tried to get her committed somewhere else.

Elizabeth Gets Help

After about a month and a half, Elizabeth threw a letter out of the window to a neighbor. A writ of habeus corpus was issued on her behalf.

Judge Charles Starr ordered Packard to bring Elizabeth to his chambers on January 12, 1864. Packard presented Elizabeth to Judge Charles Starr as ordered. He also brought the letter from the Illinois State Asylum that said she left without being cured and is incurably insane.

Packard v. Packard

The Packard v. Packard trial began on January 13, 1864.

Theophilus Packard’s lawyers produced witnesses from his church and family and even Dr. J. W. Brown, the doctor-salesman. All of whom declared Elizabeth was insane for her disobedience and for trying to leave the church.

Elizabeth Packard’s lawyers, Stephen Moore and John Orr, called witnesses who knew the Packards but were not members of her husband’s church. None of them had ever seen any signs that Elizabeth was insane. Her friend, Sarah Haslett, testified about Elizabeth’s confinement in the locked nursery. Dr. Duncanson, a physician and theologian, testified that he had interviewed Elizabeth for three hours, and while he did not agree with her beliefs, he did not call people insane “because they differ with me.”

After seven minutes of deliberation, on January 18, 1864, the jury declared Elizabeth sane.

Home Again

Elizabeth returned home, but Packard had sold their house, took her money, notes, wardrobe, and their young children back to Massachusetts with him. His actions were perfectly legal under Illinois and Massachusetts law. Elizabeth could do nothing to recover her children and property.

Elizabeth never divorced her husband, but she never returned to him either. 

Asylum Reform

Elizabeth devoted the rest of her life to changing the conditions suffered by the mentally ill. She traveled around the country and campaigned to pass laws that required a jury trial to prove insanity. 

She founded the Anti-Insane Asylum Society and published several books, including Marital Power Exemplified, or Three Years Imprisonment for Religious Belief (1864), Great Disclosure of Spiritual Wickedness in High Places (1865), The Mystic Key or the Asylum Secret Unlocked (1866), and The Prisoners’ Hidden Life, or Insane Asylums Unveiled (1868). Her book sales made her financially independent.

Various state legislatures passed thirty-four bills, which required a jury trial before anyone could commit a person to an asylum. Illinois passed such a law in 1869. In 1880, they formed The National Society for the Protection of the Insane and the Prevention of Insanity, in part because of her influence.

And she didn’t stop there.

Married Women’s Rights

Elizabeth wrote, lectured, and lobbied against the insanity of inequality for married women. She fought for a married woman’s right to own property, sign legal documents, enter a contract, obtain an education, and keep custody of her children.

She won custody of her children when they were teenagers (1873).

After her children grew up, she lobbied for people locked up in mental wards. She got laws changed in Iowa, New York, Connecticut, and then worked on a federal bill. The bill passed.

She spent fifteen years organizing 25 other states. Many laws changed because of her influence.

A Life Story Worth Telling

book cover for the woman they could not silence by Kate Moore detailing the life story of Elizabeth Packard

Elizabeth Parsons Ware Packard, also known as E.P.W. Packard, died on July 25, 1897. She faced the insanity of inequality, fought it, and won. Thousands, perhaps hundreds of thousands of mentally ill people were saved from abuse because of her. She probably saved hundreds of married women from false imprisonment for insanity. If you’d like to read more about this strong woman who fought for women’s rights check out The Woman They Could Not Silence by Kate Moore. 

Comfort for Your Monday Moaning Blues

Traditionally Monday is the worst day of the week. I get it. I used to moan about Monday. Every. Single. Week. And it never got better. Monday became a thing to dread. Until I remembered some childhood lessons. There is comfort for your Monday moaning blues in these quotes. Revisiting the wisdom in some children’s books might even be a cure.

Image background is a rumpled sheet and a rumpled pink blanket. Foreground has a sign that reads "I need cake because Monday." and a yellow tray holding a blue plate of cake. Read this post Comfort for you Monday Moaning Blues

How much good inside a day? Depends how good you live ’em. How much love inside a friend? Depends how much you give ’em.

A Light In The Attic, Shel Silverstein 

Attitude is a Choice

I think I can. I think I can. I think I can. I know I can.

The Little Engine That Could, Watty Piper

The story of The Little Engine That Could is about a happy little train carrying toys and food for girls and boys. But the engine breaks down on the wrong side of the mountain. Large, powerful engines pass by and none of them will help. Finally, a little blue engine comes. She’s never gone over the mountain before, but she thinks she can do it. And she does. 

Next Monday, listen to your co-workers. How many of them are vocalizing Monday moaning blues? How many times does their attitude affect the cheerful or okay people?

If you meet Mondays with dread because Mondays are “always” terrible. They will always be terrible. Find something good today about the day—and mean it. “It’s a beautiful day.” Stop before you grumble about being stuck inside. Whatever you focus on, you will carry with you the rest of the day.

Believe

Life will never be the same because there had never been anyone like you… ever in the world before.

On the Night You were Born, Nancy Tillman

Closely related to attitude, belief is something deeper. It’s part of the core of who you are. Sometimes, life wears you down and you doubt who you are. But belief is magic. Believe you can fly through Mondays and nothing will get you down.

The moment where you doubt whether you can fly, you cease for ever being able to do it.

Peter Pan, J.M. Barrie 

But there was one other thing that the grown-ups also knew, and it was this: that however small the chance might be of striking lucky, the chance is there. The chance had to be there. This particular bar of chocolate had as much chance as any other of having a Golden Ticket.

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Roald Dahl

Sometimes, I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.

Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland, Lewis Carroll

You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself any direction you choose. You’re on your own. And you know what to know. You are the one who’ll decide where to go.

Oh! The Places You’ll Go, Dr. Seuss

No More Monday Moaning Blues

If these quotes from beloved children’s books haven’t cured you, did they help you get through this Monday? If not, reach into your Mental Health First A

id Kit and use a tool to help make this and all the Mondays in your future better.

Image of a cartoon style Glinda the Good witch with big green eyes, purple and pink hat and dress, and a black broom. She offers comfort for your monday moaning.

You had the power all along, my dear.

Glinda the Good Witch, The Wizard of Oz, L. Frank Baum

Listen to Glinda. You have the power to cure your Monday moaning blues. How’s it going?

You Are Strong Enough

After all we’ve been through as individuals and a nation, we’re all tired. Even if we have hope, we’re stress fatigued. No matter how tired you are of all that’s happened. You are strong enough. Yes, we have months to go before we have a handle on the pandemic. Longer for economic and racial injustices to be corrected. Even longer to restore some sense of national unity. It’s exhausting. But we are strong. All of us—You are strong enough to get through this.


Strength is one of those things you’re supposed to have. You don’t feel that you have it at the time you’re going through it.

Joan Didion
Image of street signs at the crossroads of impossible and possible--you have the strength you need--choose possible

Problems are not the problem;

coping is the problem.

Virginia Satir

Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strengths. When you go through hardships and decide not to surrender, that is strength.

Arnold Schwarzenegger

Being vulnerable is not a sign of weakness.

It’s a sign of strength.

Karamo Brown

Strength and compassion are

not mutually exclusive.

Robert Kiyosaki

Stand up to your obstacles and do something about them. You will find that they haven’t half the strength you think they have.

Norman Vincent Peale

But standing up to your obstacles doesn’t mean hating or destroying or name calling. With compassion and caring and striving to understand, you will find that you can stand better and strong against your obstacles.

You Will Endure

Endure and persist;

this pain will turn to good by and by.

Ovid
Image of a hiker walking a stone path in the mountains--you can endure--you have the strength you need

We draw our strength from the very despair in which we have been forced to live. We shall endure.

Cesar Chavez

Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow. It empties today of its strength.

Corrie Ten Boom

Building mental strength is about regulating your emotions, managing your thoughts, and behaving in a positive manner, despite your circumstances.

Amy Morin

Being mentally and emotionally fatigued is normal after what we’ all have been through. It’s okay to ask for help. It’s okay to retreat for a while. Use the tools in your mental health first aid kit.

Choose Hope

Image of a little girl wearing a mask and holding a woman's hand

Each relationship nurtures a strength or weakness within you.

Mike Murdock

There is a saying in Tibetan, ‘Tragedy should be utilized as a source of strength.”No matter what sort of difficulties, how painful experience is, if we lose our hope, that’s our real disaster.

14th Dalai Lama

I am not what happened to me,

I am what I choose to become.

Carl Gustav Jung

Great works are performed not by strength but by perseverance.

Samuel Johnson

With the new day comes

new strength and new thoughts.

Eleanor Roosevelt

A hero is an ordinary individual who finds the strength to persevere and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles.

Christopher Reeve
Image of a light bulb shining and floating above a hand

The new dawn blooms as we free it. 

For there is always light, 

if only we’re brave enough to see it. 

If only we’re brave enough to be it.

Amanda Gorman

You are Strong Enough

I know many of you don’t feel you have enough strength to go on. There certainly are days when I don’t. But we can do this. We can mask. We can social distance. And we can listen to one another. We’ll learn to work together to bring equality and justice for everyone. t’s a long haul job. But we’ve got this. You’ve got this. You are strong enough. Remember that.

Will You Make It Fun?

Recently, I read a post about how constructive criticism can be destructive. In my experience, I know this to be true. I’m sure you’ve had the same experience. So why do you (I’m including me in this) continue to be your own worst enemies? Why are you your harshest judge? To fight your way free of the mental blocks (writer’s block for those doing nanowrimo). You know the ones that say housework is drudgery or the day job is soul sucking. Or something many of us are saying, 2020 is the worst year ever. It is, but… By telling yourselves over and over and over how bad things are, you reinforce the feelings that only bad things happen. For your sanity, you have to get past that. How? By having fun? What’s that you say? How can you make it fun when things are so bad? 

Nurses make it fun at work

If you obey all the rules you miss all the fun.

Katharine Hepburn

Unstructured Play

Ms. Hepburn may have been talking about rules of acting or laws or life. But here, we’re talking about having fun, unstructured play. A playful attitude and a little bending of the rules that allows all sides to have fun is great for reducing stress. It also enhances your relationships. 

You probably know that unstructured play or free play is vital to a child’s development. But it’s good for adults, too. In fact, unstructured play may help reduce the chances of Alzheimer’s or other dementias.

Live and work but do not forget to play, to have fun in life and really enjoy it.

Eileen Caddy

Read the transcript or watch this TED talk by Stuart Brown about how important play is. He discusses how lack of play is significant in the lives of murderers and other maladjusted people. But strikingly, he talks about how a husky at play causes an altered state in a wild, aggressive polar bear searing for food.

I think that success is having fun.

Bruno Mars

Fun Makes Your Brain Work Better

Follow your dreams. Just make sure to have fun too.

Chris Brown

Play lifts your mood. An enhanced mood increases dopamine. Dopamine is associated with reward, satisfaction, and motivation. Thus you pay more attention to what you’re learning or doing. 

Play for a Sense of Wellbeing

silhouettes of people playing basketball. They make it fun.

You just do what you can and you have as much fun as possible.

Frank Ocean

Play also increases serotonin. Serotonin is the key hormones that stabilizes our mood and our sense of wellbeing. It not only makes you feel better, it blocks sad thoughts and feelings. 

Even simply remembering a happy or fun event will increase your serotonin levels.

Make it Fun

At the end of the day, if I can say I had fun, it was a good day.

Simone Biles

So what do you want to say and feel at the end of the day? Try putting aside the woes and worries you have. Set aside time for play at least once a week. Every day would be better. It’s your choice. Will you make it fun? 

You Don’t Have to Be Anne Frank

Entering the second month of social distancing seems like we’re all getting a little cranky. If you’re like me, you’ve put on a stiff upper lip and soldiered on. You limit your complaints to your frustration at not being able to go to the store or out to dinner. But you don’t admit to all the other emotions. Perhaps you have some idea of how someone in isolation should act. Perhaps, like me, you hold memories of Anne Frank up as a measuring stick for success. But you don’t have to be Anne Frank.

Image of smiling Anne Frank--in social isolation you don't have to be Anne Frank

Diary of A Young Girl

I read the Diary of a Young Girl (AKA Diary of Anne Frank)  in high school and found it profoundly moving. A fourteen-year-old girl had to live in hiding for two years. She didn’t have a choice whether to hide or not. She didn’t have a prom or a graduation. And she didn’t have a choice with whom she hid. Cut off from friends and the life she knew, she documented her thoughts and dreams and frustrations in her diary.

Where there’s hope, there’s life. It fills us with fresh courage and makes us strong again.

Anne Frank was young, only thirteen, when her sister received a summons to report to a Nazi work camp in Germany. The family went into hiding.

The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely or unhappy is to go outside, somewhere where they can be quite alone with the heavens, nature and God.

Anne Frank

The Diary

Initially diary Anne recorded the thoughts and feelings of a young girl whose life had taken an extraordinary turn. Then she heard a London radio broadcast made by the exiled Dutch Minister for Education, Art, and Science, Gerrit Bolkestein. He called for the preservation of “ordinary documents—a diary, letters … simple everyday material” to create an archive for posterity as testimony to the suffering of civilians during the Nazi occupation. She rewrote her diary at that point, refining it as a testimony.

As long as this exists, this sunshine and this cloudless sky, and as long as I can enjoy it, how can I be sad?

Anne Frank

Brave and Kind and Wise

In the hidden room, Anne had to be quiet. She had to tolerate living with strangers. Though, of course they didn’t stay strangers.

I think it’s odd that grown-ups quarrel so easily and so often and about such petty matters. Up to now I always thought bickering was just something children did and that they outgrew it.

Anne Frank

She admitted to not loving her mother as much as she thought she should. And she expressed her dislike of certain of her roommates.

I can’t imagine how anyone can say: ‘I’m weak’, and then remain so. After all, if you know it, why not fight against it, why not try to train your character?

Anne Frank

Anne had a lot of time to think. She wrote with a maturity and courage beyond her year. She showed extraordinary kindness, understanding, and bravery.

There’s only one rule you need to remember: laugh at everything and forget everybody else! It sound egotistical, but it’s actually the only cure for those suffering from self-pity.

Anne Frank

Two years and one month after going into hiding, the Nazis found Anne and her family. The Nazis separated them and took them to different Nazi camps.

Only Anne’s father survived.

When he returned, friends gave him Anne’s diary. In time, he had it published.

Those who have courage and faith shall never perish in misery.

Anne Frank

You Don’t Have to be Anne Frank

For most of us quarantine is similar to the isolation Anne Frank lived, but it’s not the same. We can make noise. We can cry or scream out our frustrations. And if you know your level of stress, you can use your mental health first aid kit

However, the lessons we can learn from this young girl are many. If you haven’t read the Diary of a Young Girl, check it out. Also check out the museum Anne Frank House.

We all live with the objective of being happy; our lives are all different and yet the same.

Anne Frank

You don’t have to write a diary. You don’t have to be Anne Frank. But the next time you feel frustrated by the duration of this period of social distancing, remember Anne Frank. I know I will. And I’ll try to be a better me.