How to Turn I Can’t into I Can

Inspiration has failed me today. I have started four or five different posts and stopped. Uninspired, they failed to grab my interest. If I’m not interested, how the heck do I think I can interest anyone else? This doubt grew into an I can’t. How do you turn I can’t into I can? Resistance Steven Pressfield’s book, The War of Art, left me pretty unimpressed. I disagreed with much of what he wrote, except for his primary concept, resistance. Creatives aren’t the only ones who struggle with resistance. Resistance, or the naysaying inner voice, is a part of being human. Some call it fear. Long before I read Mr. Pressfield’s book I called my naysaying voice “the dark side” (a la Star Wars). It’s the inner voice that says, “I can’t.” Its name doesn’t matter. Recognizing when that inner voice speaks is what matters.  Don’t Go to Battle I take exception to Mr. Pressfield’s insistence that we must battle resistance. The “I can’t” means something. Sometimes “I can’t” means I’m exhausted or I’m sick or I’m distracted. Sometimes it means I’m tapped out as in empty or I’ve got nothing more to give. Forcing yourself to work when you’re empty or […]

How to Save Your Life

How to save your life? The easy answer is to take care of yourself. But taking care of yourself isn’t as subjective as it seems. Your mental health, your emotions, and your physical health can be subjective. They also need objective evaluation. Here’s the thing…if you are ignoring any part of yourself, you aren’t taking care of yourself. And guess what? If you aren’t taking care of yourself, you aren’t taking care of anyone else. Empower yourself to take care of you first.  Be Selfish Like on an airplane—give yourself the oxygen / the self-care—so that you are able to help your child or loved one. Ignoring your health and assuming you’re healthy enough can be deadly. You can do the basics: Get enough sleep Eat healthy—on the average for a week Drink plenty of water— (plenty means enough that your urine is light yellow) Get enough exercise Maintain personal hygiene Don’t take on too much (see my post, Warning 10 Signs You’ve Pushed Too Hard) But the basics may not be enough for you. You could be deluding yourself about “doing enough.” Bottom line, as you age what’s enough changes. Annual Health Needs Don’t worry. I’m not saying you […]

Alone for the Holidays

It’s Thanksgiving Day. There are many, many things for which I am grateful beyond words, but this isn’t a post about gratitude. Instead, it’s about being alone for the holidays. The holidays can be particularly stressful for those people who believe the holiday is about what should be done, for people who can not be with family, for people who have had recent personal challenges or tragedies, and for people who feel alone. This holiday season people I know and love are struggling with a variety of issues. As I prepared to write this week’s post, I thought of them and of past holidays where I have had struggles to overcome. I have spent holidays mourning and struggling. I have spent holidays alone. It took years before I felt comfortable doing what I needed at those times. I know I would have appreciated a few tips during that time, so I’m offering these few to you. If you are among those who are struggling with personal challenges or losses, remember it’s okay to feel whatever you are feeling at this time. I think Karen Mcfarland says it best: sometimes Reality Bites. If you are alone for the first time this […]